6 Responses

  1. Carmen Waterman
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    I am so glad that you continue to write :) You describe K's experience so clearly and I wonder too how others that suffer during the darker days of the year with a depression that seems to descend and hold on so tightly. I hope for breaks in the grey and light that will shine on anyone that is struggling. Believe that writing and sharing is a way to bring awareness and hope.

    You are a blessing to K and to all of us.

    • Jane Waterman
      | Reply

      I'm sorry I missed replying to this one, Sweetie. Sometimes it's so easy to turn to you and say thanks, that I forget to write here. :) I love and appreciate your full support, even when I feel like I'm stumbling in the dark and not quite sure what I'm trying to say or do. xxxx

  2. Annette McKinnon (@a
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    I wonder if music would help her at all. I have spent a lot of time over the years finding and downloading free music from music blogs. It's an annual even to get the years top music from Tangmonkey. And I was looking at Largehearted Boy's list of lists from various blogs and organizations and got a great new tip for music I like. That helps me some.

    So many people never listen to anything beyond their high school favourites. Just a thought anyway

    I read a series of books some years ago about a sleuth who was bipolar (I am a big mystery fan). They were by Abigail Padgett. I am afraid that they contain the bulk of my bipolar knowledge and I hope you don't feel I am trivializing.

    Could starting flower bulbs help a little? That adds some colour, or how about digital art?

    Well good to hear from you. You must be inspiring. I did 2 blog posts within 2 days. I need to research ways to spruce up the blog. There are many things I don't know.

    • blackbirdatnight
      | Reply

      I was surprised I didn't get notified about your new blog entries. I thought I subscribed! Two posts in two days is great! :)

      Like you, there's a lot I don't know about the "new-age" blog. I used to do a lot of programming back in the day and could fix most things on blogs, but with my increasing brain fog and more blogs to maintain – for me, my better half, and our two daughters for starters, I moved everything to WordPress. I like the whole plugin bit with WP. I am going to do some work on my blog in the next few weeks (I like to have a little project at Christmas).

      I'm fairly new at gardening – at least winter gardening. Can you grow bulbs in the winter? Or do you mean plant now and wait for spring? I would like to have a greenhouse one day, but that will be a while off.

      K- likes music. I'll look into the sites you mention and see if I can send her some things to inspire her. I did try to get her interested in the art, but she seems down on it at the moment. A shame because she was taking lots of great photos all summer and has some really good material to make art with.

      I'm starting to learn more about bipolar, but what I do know is just from K-'s experiences so far. I'm hoping to have more time to read and learn at Christmas too – it's a time I do get a little sad (I don't know exactly why when my wife is a total Christmas bug), so I like to keep busy.

      More soon – and I'll come over to check out your blog soon (and see if I can or did subscribe). :)

      Take care!

  3. Larry Wentzel
    | Reply

    I went through some heavy depression periods, and as I've gotten older, find myself more affected by winter depression than before. I got medication for a while, and then went to a therapist for depression. I was taught cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). My therapist recommended reading Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by David Burns, which uses CBT and provides various ways to diagnose your moods and how to move yourself beyond depression, anger, low self-esteem, etc.

    Two of the steps that I've adopted into my (more or less) daily routine is A) writing down what I accomplish in a day, no matter how small. It's the inverse of a "to-do" list; it's a "got done" list. The point is to show you how much you actually do in a day and to take heart in the knowledge that you do all of this, and it helps inspire you to do more: "well, that wasn't as bad as I thought, I might as well do this other thing as well." David Burns counsels adding before/after comments about how much enjoyment you expect in doing X and how much enjoyment you actually got in doing X. B) writing every day about what is bothering you, why it's bothering you, what's at the root of that, and applying realistic thoughts as a counter to your bothers. Sometimes we expect people to behave in a manner we want, not in the manner they actually do behave. Sometimes we worry about disasters that likely never come, focus on only negative things to the exclusion of any good, mistake influencing others/events for wanting to control them, or expect ourselves to be more perfect than we expect anyone else to be.

    Doing these things helps keeps me motivated to try things and take enjoyment in them, and to ground me about negative thoughts and feelings swirling in my head. It takes effort to do new things, but seeing what I did encourages me to do more.

    You might also try a sun lamp. I used one for a while as I was still warming up to CBT, and then gave it away later (but I still sometimes wish I had it). It seems weird, but it's actually nice to bask in bright, natural light for a bit.

    • Jane Waterman
      | Reply

      Hi Larry,

      Thanks so much for writing, and for the excellent summary of CBT and different techniques! In 1995, I was likewise introduced to CBT and David Burns' book by my psychologist at the time. It's indeed an excellent book. I believe my psychologist and the therapy proposed in Burns' book really saved my life. There are also many excellent programs based in CBT that are available on the internet. The one that most readily comes to mind is the 'Living Life to the Full' program at llttf.com.

      I love the idea of a 'got done' list. That's so much more helpful than a 'to do' list, which is something we often use to beat ourselves up with. As you say, I'm sure we'd all be surprised at what we actually got done if we took the time to list it.

      Thanks also for the feedback about the full spectrum lamp. It is something I'd like to look into for my daughter, provided the cost is not too prohibitive. We bought some full spectrum light bulbs for her room, but I don't know if that's enough on its own.

      Blessings,
      Jane

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